Tuesday, August 2, 2011

I Need a New Crush.

I don't know how anyone else feels about crushes, but I love them. I think I enjoy having crushes more than having actual relationships. Why? Because crushes can be everything you imagine them being and more! Real relationship have harsh realities, such as incompatibility, terrible discussions regarding Foucault or Steven King or why bell hooks doesn't capitalize her name--or the person could have a bad smell or be like sexually anorexia or something. But crushes, crushes are always fun.

And I haven't had a good crush in awhile.

Jake Gyllenhaal you are not doing it for me any more.

(okay...maybe doing it for me a little still.)
Jakey-poo, I am sorry. You are attractive and those dimples are freaking ridiculous, and those puppy dog eyes... but come on! It's been like almost ten years now. TEN YEARS!!!!

It's time for a change.

I considered James Franco for awhile--mainly because of that shit-eating-grin of his (that's what they call it in Kansas) but then I read this article on how he's like an ego-maniac and I was like, duh. Over it.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not just here looking for a new celebrity crush; I like to have real-life-people crushes too. (I'd name past ones but they might read this and feel weird around me so I'll just keep those to myself).


If you're in my real-life, wink at me or something and I'll figure out if I want to crush on you or not.

This also works for friend-crushes. I remember the excitement and thrill of meeting and finally hanging out with Lizz (name droppin, what). I didn't like fantasize about her or anything, but I had extra energy in my life because I had met someone who was soooo cool (and still is).

I'd like that. Again.

Though really a celebrity or real-life (non-friend) crush crush would be super amazing.

Who's hot right now?

Who should I crush on?

Thoughts, suggestions, and/or resumes would be appreciated.

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