The Path of the (Un) Natural.

(Me, Frontier Park, Hays, KS 2006)

In 2006 I dyed my hair fuchsia for the first time. And though it is considered an “unnatural” hair color I actually feel quite natural with fuchsia hair.

I don't know why. Perhaps it's because it highlights my inner eccentricities. Perhaps because I automatically become an "outsider" without having to put really any effort into it. I mean I can wear jeans and a t-shirt and still be able to express my "wild" personality.

Though I don't know if wild is the right word. The hair though, seems to give me permission to be my weird self. And that's one of the main reasons I like it.

(me, Halloween, Hays, KS 2006)

It's hard to keep up though. And the strange looks and pointing can get a little redundant. So, that's why it's taken me so long to do it again. I found the color months ago, when I still lived in Chicago, it was on sale at Walgreens or CVS or something for like $3. I couldn’t pass it up, yet I couldn’t get myself to dye it. So we moved with it.

It finally felt like the right time. I don't have a job. I don't know if I'll get the job I really want and if I do it's at an art gallery and if an art gallery has a probably with pink hair, well, then, we're all in trouble.

I know it's really not that big of deal, people dye their hair strange colors all the time, people pierce and tattoo their bodies, people sculpt their bodies through exercise or surgery all in an attempt to alter who they originally were.

(video shot earlier today)

And that's really what I find so interesting--this drive to change, to transform one's self. What do we do it for? Or a better question, who do we do it for? It's obviously not just for myself. I sit at my desk in my bedroom practically all day long, maybe the hair is just trying to shout out that "I'm still here." Perhaps that's why people do body modifications--to feel that they're still here and get a visual, lasting, reminder.

I know that many people change their hair style after life altering moments occur, a break-up, a death, a really bad wedding, but for me, I think it had more to do with stagnation. I don't ever want to bore myself. I want to still surprise myself and other people. I want to look in the mirror and go, "yep, I'm still alive and kicking it." Mundanity will not find me.

With time, I sure not boring myself will take a less physical route, perhaps I'll find my "inner peace," but for now I'm just going to enjoy (un)naturally standing out. (Whenever I actually do go out.)

(me, last night)